Friday, May 30, 2008

the collective gasp

i went to the midnight showing of "sex and the city" last night. yes i know that might be a little frightening/sad for some of you, but it's carrie, miranda, charlotte, and samantha!!! if you haven't seen the movie yet, stop reading here. i'm not giving anything major away, just a fun moment in the movie. when big shows carrie her closet in their new house, it is an awe inspiring moment. big opens the double doors into the mansion of a closet he built for carrie, and at that moment there was a collective gasp in the theatre that sucked nearly every bit of oxygen out of the room. i looked around and saw every woman with their hand over her mouth in amazement. i laughed. sure, i was jealous of the closet too, but not enough to contribute to the vacuum. if you ever saw an episode of "sex and the city," you must go see the movie. if you haven't but like funny, art-imitating-life movies, go see it. ~aroll

Thursday, May 22, 2008

missional church series & my posting...

so at missiongathering, we have been in a series for the last few weeks about the missional church called "heroes: save the church save the world." we created a website for the series for a couple of reasons: 1. we wanted to create an open source website for other churches to use the material and have access to graphics, videos, etc. sermon notes are posted as well. 2. we wanted to create a place for our community to connect and dialogue about the content of the series. in light of the website and my lack of time to barely keep up with one blog, the vast majority of my ideas on church and theology will likely end up there. check it out by clicking here. ~aroll

the grandeur of a "calling"

last night at my sanctuary, we were talking about what it means to live missionally - a topic that i preached on sunday morning. in the course of the conversation, jay brought up the question of what each one of us is doing to act on it this week, what is our "piece" of living missionally. we went around the circle sharing what it might look like for each one of us personally, with it being acceptable, of course, to still be figuring it out. one girl shared that she wasn't sure what her calling was so she didn't know what her "piece" was.

in the last 3-4 months, this is an idea/issue i have been wrestling with quite a bit. there are several components of my life - job, relationship, circumstances - with which i'm not very happy/satisfied/content. through many conversations, tears, and journaling, i've come to the reality of the need to simply live in the present. my friends holly and ryan sharp from san francisco wrote a song called "you might not know you're home 'til you've landed." the chorus closes with the line "your two feet may tell you where you're standing." there is a sense in which i think we caught up in the grandeur of a calling. it sounds so noble: "i am called to help the poor in india." is a calling a good thing? absolutely. for me, my perception of my calling and passion has been a source of frustration and sometimes depression. my calling is much bigger than my circumstances are allowing right now. what i've realized is that i need to look where my own two feet are and do the best with my circumstances. i may not have everything i want now, may not be doing everything i want to do now, but now isn't forever. so what can i accomplish now? how do i live into who i am in the context of my life at the moment.

so what's my "piece" right now of living my faith out? i am being open about my faith. for a long time when i would be out meeting new people, i would be shy/reserved/hesitant about mentioning my involvement in a church and my faith. why? i suppose i was afraid of being labeled, rejected, or written off given the experience many in our community have had with the church. since my decision to not really care how people react when i talk about it, i have had some really great conversations about church, God, faith, and life. some people have mocked and been negative, but mostly people are intrigued or honestly don't care one way or another. the lesson: don't get lost in hope of finding and living the grandeur of your calling (which you may or may not have/find/know) and simply decide who you are now and what you do in the moment. calling will come without sacrificing the impact i can have now. ~aroll

Monday, May 19, 2008

music makes me happy

in college i started out as a double-major in history and music. music has always been a huge part of my life. i took piano from the age of 4 to 17. in middle school, high school, and college, i studied classical vocal music - opera, art song, etc. when i lived in tulsa during college i would frequently go to the opera, the philharmonic, and the ballet with my aunt and uncle. in my 6.5 years of living in san diego, i had yet to go to any of those musical/art experiences...until yesterday. sean laperruque, the violin player in our band at missiongathering, got us tickets to the symphony. i was so excited. there was the music from a ballet inspired by oscar wilde, the Tchaikovsky piano concerto no. 1, and Dvorak's symphony "from the new world." i left the hall with a big grin on my face. it was a wonderful afternoon. music really does make me happy....more on this topic coming soon. ~aroll